16 years ago
Quickwrite
Do you remember in elementary school when the teacher would put aside 10 minutes in the morning for all the students to do a quickwrite... basically 10 minutes of writing whatever you feel like on a sheet of paper? I feel like doing that today. So here it is, 12:34PM >start<
I am listening to the Marie Antoinette soundtrack right now at work, trying to get in the mood to actually get some work done. This soundtrack reminds me of running. I first heard the soundtrack a couple of years ago, when Yona sent me the mp3's from Japan. I remember listening to this soundtrack during my Brentwood runs, after my gym session with Russ. I don't remember any of the thoughts that went through my mind during the runs (there are usually a lot) but I do remember the feeling. Somehow this soundtrack always makes me feel like I'm on the outside looking in, observing how trivial and menial my problems really are. Makes me feel small.
I like feeling small. This is probably why I love to go to the beach, especially at night. When you see something so vast like the ocean, or even being one out of many on a crowded beach, it just makes you feel so small. In comparison to those around me, how important am I really? How many people does my existence effect? Do my problems, worries and quandaries carry any weight when compared to everyone else's? I like fading into the background, thinking that my existence is meaningless and unnoticed. I don't know why that is, I just do.
So everyone is talking about Halloween today. I thought for a minute that it might be fun to dress up but then realized I would probably have to wake up at 6 am to properly dress up. You see, our Halloween theme this year is "Mad Rapp," taken from the TV show "Mad Men." I never know when to put the period inside the quotes or outside. Anyways, for a girl to dress up in the 60's era it takes a LOT of effort. Not necessarily just the clothing -- since I'm sure I'll be able to find something that will fit the era. But the hair! There is just no way Asian hair will curl and tease up into a hairdo worthy of the 60's. Although this does remind me of a photo I came across of my grandmother when she was young and she did have the bob going. So needless to say, I will not be dressing up. Maybe I'll bring Lulu dressed up in a 60's-esque dress. Again, it all depends on how early I wake up tomorrow.
Which brings me to my next topic- sleep. I knocked out on the couch yesterday around 8pm. I woke up at around 10pm -- just enough time to take Lulu out one last time and then crashed again until 7:45AM. That's almost 12 hours of sleep! I finally felt well-rested. I've been so lethargic lately at work. It's starting to worry me -- I'm used to the usual bout of exhaustion but this feels largely like something else. If I go back in history to the times I've had any problems with sleep (falling asleep, waking up, still feeling tired), they were all at points in my life where I was confused, depressed or generally unhappy. I really hope this is not the case now.
Oh what I'd give to be at home right now. Now that I'm living alone I feel so guilty leaving Lulu every morning. I guess she expects it. She somehow knows the difference between my getting ready to go to work or when I leave the house to run a quick errand. When it is the latter, she makes a huge stink about my not bringing her, usually in the form of excessive barking. I wonder what her cue is? Is it the time of day I leave? The amount of time it takes for me to get ready? My choice in footwear? All I know is that when I leave to take a jog, do laundry or take out the trash, she barks like crazy, as if she knows that technically, I could bring her along. But when I get ready and leave for work, she sits there silently.
Okay! That marks 10 minutes.
I am listening to the Marie Antoinette soundtrack right now at work, trying to get in the mood to actually get some work done. This soundtrack reminds me of running. I first heard the soundtrack a couple of years ago, when Yona sent me the mp3's from Japan. I remember listening to this soundtrack during my Brentwood runs, after my gym session with Russ. I don't remember any of the thoughts that went through my mind during the runs (there are usually a lot) but I do remember the feeling. Somehow this soundtrack always makes me feel like I'm on the outside looking in, observing how trivial and menial my problems really are. Makes me feel small.
I like feeling small. This is probably why I love to go to the beach, especially at night. When you see something so vast like the ocean, or even being one out of many on a crowded beach, it just makes you feel so small. In comparison to those around me, how important am I really? How many people does my existence effect? Do my problems, worries and quandaries carry any weight when compared to everyone else's? I like fading into the background, thinking that my existence is meaningless and unnoticed. I don't know why that is, I just do.
So everyone is talking about Halloween today. I thought for a minute that it might be fun to dress up but then realized I would probably have to wake up at 6 am to properly dress up. You see, our Halloween theme this year is "Mad Rapp," taken from the TV show "Mad Men." I never know when to put the period inside the quotes or outside. Anyways, for a girl to dress up in the 60's era it takes a LOT of effort. Not necessarily just the clothing -- since I'm sure I'll be able to find something that will fit the era. But the hair! There is just no way Asian hair will curl and tease up into a hairdo worthy of the 60's. Although this does remind me of a photo I came across of my grandmother when she was young and she did have the bob going. So needless to say, I will not be dressing up. Maybe I'll bring Lulu dressed up in a 60's-esque dress. Again, it all depends on how early I wake up tomorrow.
Which brings me to my next topic- sleep. I knocked out on the couch yesterday around 8pm. I woke up at around 10pm -- just enough time to take Lulu out one last time and then crashed again until 7:45AM. That's almost 12 hours of sleep! I finally felt well-rested. I've been so lethargic lately at work. It's starting to worry me -- I'm used to the usual bout of exhaustion but this feels largely like something else. If I go back in history to the times I've had any problems with sleep (falling asleep, waking up, still feeling tired), they were all at points in my life where I was confused, depressed or generally unhappy. I really hope this is not the case now.
Oh what I'd give to be at home right now. Now that I'm living alone I feel so guilty leaving Lulu every morning. I guess she expects it. She somehow knows the difference between my getting ready to go to work or when I leave the house to run a quick errand. When it is the latter, she makes a huge stink about my not bringing her, usually in the form of excessive barking. I wonder what her cue is? Is it the time of day I leave? The amount of time it takes for me to get ready? My choice in footwear? All I know is that when I leave to take a jog, do laundry or take out the trash, she barks like crazy, as if she knows that technically, I could bring her along. But when I get ready and leave for work, she sits there silently.
Okay! That marks 10 minutes.
Christmas plans?
Come on people! Crate & Barrel and Bloomingdale's already has Christmas stuff up! We need to decide... are we doing Secret Santa? Are we changing up the rules? Handmade only? Is Aai flying here? Are we flying to Indiana? Am I getting a real tree?
I... need... to... KNOW!!!